Impromptu Murmur

Tragedy we are, who always believe in rumour-mongers.
Result will only be released on 23rd...
What kind of mixed feeling is this?
I'm actually kinda happy!!! But of course along with worries and anxiety.
So the delayed announcement indicates the prolongation of my relaxing days,
still 2 more weeks to be totally laid-back,
and after that, perhaps things are going to become normal again.
No more routine checking for FB updates right after bathing every morning...
No more historical books, novels, newspapers or any reading anytime as I wish so...
No more late-night online chatting and exploration of interesting stuff...
It's like a dream...... because it probably comes only once into my life,
the invaluable transitional period to really ponder on life,
in an extraordinary way.
For the next time it happens to come again... perhaps after retirement?
Ah and I doubt if I ever have the chance to do so as according to some of the greatest prophecies, every human being on Earth, will be at world's end by the end of 2012.
So I'm only 19 by that time, hmmmmmm what a pity...
EURO would have just called its prettiest end in Poland & Ukraine,
and Brazil would stamp in anger for burning $11++ billions on its national religion.

What a bad habit to always inadvertently murmur...
I think it's because such chances would decrease drastically after receiving my final judgement...
Am I afraid? I am... I am not...
In my prayers I beseech God to give me strength to pull through this...
I just wanna live out my own way... at least I don't think my will would lead me to the demise.

I Miss You

Since when... you're not here to stay?
Oh my... how time does fly...
You're everywhere down my memory lane...
But I can't see you every day, every second,
so I chose my heart as a place to keep you safe.

I never forget that special name,
how could I get you out of my mind?
But I'm not allowed to go on this way...
For this is the sin which'll always remain forbidden,
so I tried to erase you slowly from my life.

Ah! And there you came...
Without any omen for the presence.
I could hardly believe my ears during that moment.
It's you! It's you!
I know... I always know...
You're always there...
Ah... even loving you costs me a death...
Let it be...... it's just death...